main reason and concept for this
Main body the 5 stages
Conclusion to the blog
Communication is communication isn’t it? No need for a complicated equation, I mean people talk, people listen people move on amicably with respect and understanding, don’t they?
If only that was true. Communication at the best of times is a tricky complex state of affairs, and that is with communication that is welcomed by all who is involved. But what about communication that is pitted with conflict and struggle.
If this is the case let’s look at the following communication cycle.
The communication cycle
The communication cycle is a five-step process that allows you to plan for a challenging conversation. You might ask yourself why you might want to do this? Well the answer is simple, a conversation not planned for is an argument waiting to happen.
Not only is it a way to plan for a conversation, it is also a method of analysing your own abilities as an individual to grow and become a stronger person. Enough said so let us look at the five stages individually.
Step 1: – Identifying the hurdles
I am not going to say that this is a vital stage like it is more important than the other stage. For this stage you are going to need to write down all the issues in the situation that you are going to cover in your communication. Writing them down will allow you to keep your focus on them and not miss any out. If there is more than one issue it would also be a good idea to note them from the largest to smallest issue and work out what order you’re going to deal with them within your communication.
This will give you a physical knowing of how big the situation is. We are all guilty of allowing our minds to run away with problems and in our mind chatter these issues can seem to grow out of our control and could cause us to feel overwhelmed.
Writing the issues down with the details of each can take back the control of this overwhelming feeling and allow you to gain focus of the situations again.
Step 2: – Who can be affected
You might think that the only people who can be affected by this communication is you and the other individuals involved in the communication. Unfortunately, it rarely is, we all have people that are that close to us that they experience what we are going through in their own way. These people could be your family and friends, just to name a few.
The reason for them being affected is because they care that much about you that when your mood changes, they will be affected by this as well. This is inevitable and will happen that is why this stage exists.
For this stage you need to write down all the people that could be affected by this and understand how they can be affected. Knowing this will allow you to plan a better conversation that is calmer and one that aims for a solution. You do not want any outcome affecting you in such a way that it then allows for a negative effect to those around you.
Step 3: – Self analysis
Now we start looking at yourself in this situation. It is very important for an amicable solution to be made that you know and address any areas of development within yourself.
These can be anything from confidence, to anxiety or fear of confrontation. All these in a conversation can be better managed by understanding assertiveness and how questions impact a conversation.
The best thing about this stage is you might find an area of yourself that you want to start working on, so they are no longer an area of development instead they are now one of your go to strengths.
You must be honest with yourself at this stage and ask yourself what are all the real reasons for you not wanting this conversation to happen. It could be fear or judgement or anything. Write down how the thought of this conversation is making your feel and then think of times when those feelings were linked to a positive situation.
Here is an example;
The thought of this conversation turns my stomach and gives me butterflies. I remember my first date that gave me the same feelings and it was good to feel them.
This is just a way to confuse the feeling. Your mind is taking that feeling as a bad thing when it has taken it as a good one before. You just have to remind yourself of this and that is a way of regaining control of the emotions of the situation.
There are loads of other written practices you can do to gain control of your mindset that work well and allow for long term positive change.
Step 4: – Communicate
This is where you have to actually have the conversation. There are strategies that you could follow to help. It is a good idea in the conversation to go through a good listening routine, summarise and feedback types in your responses. Also, being assertive would be very good in these situations.
Doing all of these would help with the best possible outcome to a conversation that looks after everyone’s best interests.
Step 5: – Review
This stage is good for a few reasons. You will be able to reflect and embed best practice or analyse and change areas of your plan so in future things go better.
The best plans are only become the best actions when they have been tested. If it did not go so well it is only showing you that you missed something and if you now plan for this it will have a better result in the future.
This is not just reviewing the communication itself but all the stages of the communication cycle.
When things do not seem to work it isn’t a reason to stop trying it is evidence that planning helps with an outcome. No matter what if you have spent time on planning but at the end of the conversation isn’t the best, there will still be areas that would have worked well. You should acknowledge all of these and keep moving forward.
To sum this is up, the communication cycle is a process that will allow you to look at specifics of what needs to be covered and what needs to be considered for your actual conversation.
It is there to allow you to gain this insight but also to look at yourself as a person and give you the platform to grow and become stronger.